Worried? You Should Be!

Q: What will it cost to lose my soul at Scream Fest?

A : Don't be taken aback by the very reasonable prices - you are worth oh so much more than the mere $15 ($20 on Fridays and Saturdays). As your soul slips away you will find that pittance not only gets you into all 5 haunted houses - you get to go back to your favourite one again at the end of the evening (but seriously, no one has ever survived that long). And since you aren’t even making us chase you down, for that low, low price you get a pair of 3D glasses and all the free entertainment roaming around to keep you from noticing we are trying to lure you into a cooking pot. Games are extra, but for that you can win some prizes (though Satan hardly ever lets you keep ‘em once you get to Hell).

Q: I get off work late from the morgue. Can I still come by Scream Fest for an after-hours scare?

A : Depends. If your bagging and tagging ends before 10:00 p.m. - by all means, bring your formaldehyde reeking carcass down here - but be warned: Hours for Scream Fest are: Fridays & Saturdays: 7:00 PM to Midnight, all other open nights (check Vitals for dates we are open) 7:00 PM to 11:00 PM. It takes a while to disembowel you, so ticket sales stop ONE hour before closing.

Q: Is Scream Fest for kids?

A: You mean tender, delicious, easy to fool kids? Well, all ages are really well advised to Stay the Hell Away from Zombies!! But if you really feel it’s time to give your kids something to cry about, this might be it.

Worldly twelve year-olds will probably fair okay, but no younger. And always with an adult. It’s called ‘Scream’ Fest, not ‘Tee Hee’ Fest. But seriously, kids who aren’t keen to be scared should NOT attend ScreamFest, even with their favourite Nanna along for support. We are out to really, really scare adults. You better be one stout hearted kid to attend – WITH AN ADULT. Preferably an out of shape, easily fooled one.

Q: Should I even be going to ScreamFest?

A : ScreamFest isn't wheelchair accessible and there are lots of things like fog, strobe lights and the whole point is to get really stinkin' frightened. So do not enter if you have a health condition that may deteriorate because of the elements of this event.

Also, this event is rated PG13 so although we will let ANYONE in (the zombies are always hungry), we recommend proceeding with caution when bringing children under 12 or sissies.

Q: I know we're supposed to be scared, but will we be cold and hungry too?

A : The tents and houses are heated (there seems to be a temperature spike when people are running and screaming – we’re working on fixing that – permanently). In some sections you will be scared and outdoors where most of the undead live - so dress warm. There are food and refreshments for sale on-site - eat up! Zombies love a plump catch.

Q: Yippee! Yipee! Yipee! I like games. What kind of games do you have?

A : Goody! We love the irony of Game wanting to play games. Scream Fest has several very distracting games in the Fest-Evil Tent.

  • Test your strength with the skull smash
  • Toss the severed head into the monster's mouth
  • Use the severed head to spray blood into the big severed head's (this is becoming a theme) mouth
  • Fish dead bodies from the river  
  • Throw darts at the Wheel of Misfortune
  • Shoot paintballs at the cute little fuzzy bunny

Games cost $3, or you can use your “Killer Cash” which  can be purchased with your event ticket at a discount!

Q: What can I win!? What can I win!?

A : Settle. You can try to win your soul back from Satan Mwaa! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!  Okay really, You can win: "Deady" Bears, 6' Blow-up Aliens, Pocket Goth Dolls, Transylvanian Teddies, Monsters, Giant Snakes & Spiders and other Halloween stuffies.

Q: What if I'm so scared, you know ... I have to use the facilities? Are there facilities?

A : Do not use an open grave for your business. There are perfectly good washrooms on-site.

Q: Will the zombies actually bite me?

A : Not only will the zombies not bite you, they will never touch you. Nor will any of the other spooks, devils, ghosts, witches, aliens, killer clowns or mad scientists. ScreamFest is a strictly no touching event - for you either. We don't want to bring your disgusting germs back to the underworld.

Q: Okay ... I'm pretty sure something touched me in "The Last Ride". What gives?

A : You were touched, but not by the undead or the alive. The things that are giving you nightmares now were completely inanimate objects doing exactly what they were meant to do...creep the hell out of you.

Q: I know it's all a trick, but what if the zombies do come to life and start attacking?

A : We have real first aid set up and security on-site.